Oh, my children, how do I sum up the matter of faith?  I know I can go through anything or any place because God is next to me.  Sometimes, He is holding my hand skipping next to me.  Sometimes, He is walking in front of me leading the way, breaking the wind.  Sometimes, He is on the sidelines yelling encouragement to keep going forward in His plan.  Sometimes, He is walking behind me giving me a little push.  I know I can sound like an old fart, however, I must say it.  Your relationship with God is the single most important thing to put effort into.  When you are on God’s path, life just seems so clear.  When God isn’t the focus and I don’t pay attention to His direction, there just seems to be no peace.  As it says in Isaiah 55:9, God’s ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts higher than our thoughts.  He knows, really He does, I promise.  I have been on both sides of the coin.  I promise you, it IS better with Him. 

There was one point in my life where I wanted nothing to do with God.  If He created this mess, then He wasn’t for me.  Unfortunately it wasn’t Him who created it and I was allowing my view of mankind to be my view of God.  As I have matured in my life, I have realized what a big part God really does play for me.  He is the backbone of which I can function on those days I want to crawl back in bed.  He is my redeemer, restorer, and my rewarder.

God wants to use for amazing things, however, if we aren’t ready, He will use someone else who is.  You can kiss that blessing good-bye.  I could tell you of all the lessons I have learned in life, however, that would be pointless.  Your journey is different than mine.  As long as you are spending time reading/applying the Word, seeking God in prayer, and quieting your heart to hear Him, He will guide you.

Usually God and I get along. Right now…I am sooo angry at Him. I get the fact I needed to slow down and eliminate some things. I am a good wife and listened to my hubby who recently suggested that. Do I really need to be pretty much incapacitated though? I have to take oxycodone just to be able to move. Why God did you have to mess up my back so bad? I have just started to get back to exercising and getting my life in a rhythm. Now, I can hardly move, I can’t be the mom I want to be nor care for myself how I want. All I can do is sit in this damn rocking chair. I can’t even sit on the couch because it makes my back worse. I keep crying because I am so incredibly frustrated and feel guilty not being able to care for my kids how they need. Come on God, can’t You give me a break?? It has already been 5 days!